Integrity and Personal Freedom.

Integrity and Personal Freedom.

Personal integrity is one of the most, if not the most important practices to lead a fulfilling life. Many people don't recognize the cost of breaking our word to ourselves and to others. Our word becomes limp, meaningless. When we are out of integrity we eat away at our own self esteem. We then blame external circumstances for the hell we have created... attempting to shift the responsibility to any place but our own shoulders. All personal freedom begins with being in integrity.

The soul is dyed the color of its thoughts. Think only on those things that are in line with your principles and can bear the light of day. The content of your character is your choice. Day by day, what you do is who you become. Your integrity is your destiny - it is the light that guides your way. ~ Heraclitus

I love how the journey to health and wellness is a microcosm for the entirety of our lives. When we break our word and don’t get the exercise we have committed to or don’t eat in a way we know supports our body, we suffer with lower self esteem and a self perpetuating downward spiral begins, and of course, the excuse making we engage in attempts to justify the breaking of our word. When believe our excuses, we become victims. We give away our power to choose.

I find that when people are held accountable a few common things happen; they enter fight/flight mode or they soften become coachable / teachable and receptive.

It has been my experience that fight/flight mode is a mechanism that the ego loves to use to keep us stuck in the prison we have created for ourselves… keeping us disempowered and victim to our circumstances.

FIGHT mode is a smokescreen characterized by aggression, anger, growling, bearing of teeth. The ego’s unconscious supposition is that… if I become hostile towards the force that is holding me accountable for being what I declared I want to be… I will be left alone to continue to stay engaged its toxic patterns of being out of integrity, addiction to substance, sex, work, t.v., video games, etc… what ever it is that the ego is invested in that is keeping us from becoming our empowered ideal. Those in fight mode want to rip the wings off those flying higher than them.  

FLIGHT mode I call the “ostrich syndrome”. This is where the ego will simply avoid any and all interaction with forces of accountably. This is an attempt to believe, “If I can’t see it, it doesn’t exist.” This is the ultimate distraction. We check out, numb out and if any feelings arise around the depletion of our self worth we step up our distraction behaviors our addictions to substance, sex, work, t.v., video games, etc… our head goes further down the ostrich hole. Ego gets to stay in control. 

It is in NOTICING our tendency to go to FIGHT or FLIGHT that we can choose to soften and become open, receptive, coachable and teachable. However, what we don’t notice we can’t change. This is the importance of awareness. This is where transformation can occur. This is where we can choose something outside the realm of what our ego has been repeating over and over. This is where we can interrupt our toxic cycles. Surrender. Become teachable. Open vs. constrict.

*Not sure if you are open or constricted? Look to your breath. Is your breathing soft, open easy? Or are you so wrapped up that you aren't even taking a breath or your breath is fast, short and shallow?  

Go ahead, list your excuses for not getting healthy, saving money, stopping an addictive behavior, getting out of a toxic job / relationship or what ever you know your grow area to be.

I can’t because I have bills to pay.

I can’t because I have to take care of my kids.

I can’t because my mom needs me help.

Don’t fool yourself. It isn’t that you can’t… you won’t. It is just so easy to believe yourself when you say you can’t.Can’t takes your personal responsibility for the situation away and makes you a victim. Won’t  is the truth of the matter. For every excuse we can create we can finds dozens, hundreds if not thousands upon thousands of people that took responsibility regardless of their circumstances.

Once we recognize that it is not that we can’t it is that we won’t, we can no longer pretend that we don’t have the power to change our circumstance. It is here we can step into the next question…

“How can I?”